Self-pity: how to get rid of it

People who feel sorry for themselves constantly feel apathy, they do not have enough strength for elementary actions. They do not want to solve their own problems, so they quickly avoid them. Such people are waiting or looking for their rescuer. Which will arrange them a sweet life without worries and worries.

But there is another, more productive way, thanks to which you do not have to look for a rescuer. This is work on oneself, this approach is complex, but very effective and long-term. It will help to get out of the emotional hole, as a result, the person stops feeling self-pity. How can this be achieved? Read the article to the end and find out!

Signs of self-pity

  1. When a person experiences feelings of apathy, resentment and irritation.

  2. In all the troubles of a whiner, others are to blame.

  3. Such people are not ready to take responsibility for their lives.

  4. Self-pity people see the world in black and white.

  5. The person considers himself unsuccessful and is sure that he has no potential.

  6. Such people do not want to let go of the past.

What is the benefit of pity?

  1. Removal of self-responsibility. When a person convinces himself that in a given situation it is not his fault. It was all set up on purpose, and he just got into these networks by negligence.

  2. Spiritual excellence. The offended person sheds tears, condemns the actions of the offender, pity himself. After all, he is not like the offender, he is better than him.

  3. It s easier to blame others than to admit your mistake. It is easier for such people to grieve, to exaggerate the problem. So they feel special, not like a gray mass. They consider themselves ideal, not like those around them.

Reasons for self-pity

High demands on reality

Any unpredictable situation can annoy the whiner. If he was late for work, then the public transport, which was driving slowly, is to blame. I made a mistake in the report, it is due to a failure in the computer system.

The presence of hypochondria

Those who feel sorry for themselves can easily find symptoms of a disease in themselves. They don t feel well most of the time. Either they have a headache, or their stomach, throat, etc. Therefore, they closely monitor their body and carefully treat themselves.

Dependence on someone else s opinion

Independent and self-respecting people prefer to decide for themselves what to do in a given situation. They do not need advice, someone else s opinion or decrees. As for the whiners, the opposite is true. After all, they do not want to take responsibility.

See no light at the end of the tunnel

If such people find themselves in a crisis situation, then they direct their energy to self-digging, fall into depression and are in no hurry to get out of it. Instead of gathering willpower and overcoming all difficulties. They believe that everything will never be better.

How to get rid of this?


For this, meditation, affirmation, yoga are suitable. Listen, watch, read self-hypnosis texts and exercises. The main message in them should be that you are the best, you will be able to overcome all the problems, the accumulated experience gives you more strength and energy.

Choice of public opinion

You need to realize that you are already an adult who can spit on someone else s opinion. A stranger does not know the whole story of your life, so he has no right to judge you or advise you. Stop this behavior from others. Think about whose opinion is really important to you? Why is it important to you? Do you want to please this person or is he motivating you?

Negative behavior

Are you often offended by other people s behavior? You often wonder how they can afford this? In order not to feel constantly offended or deprived, change your model of behavior. It is difficult for you to tell a person directly that whatever you think about him – act. You cannot refuse a close friend, the time has come.

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Camden and Hayley George on Unsplash

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