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Self-development is a fashionable and popular trend of today. Someone develops spiritually, physically, professionally – but everyone has their own preference in this direction. People who are not engaged in self-development are considered boring, lagging and lazy. It turns out that even those who are actively working on themselves can make mistakes. Because of this, either the process of self-development slows down, or desire disappears. What mistakes are we talking about? Let’s take a look at each of them in detail.

Development through strength

This can be observed in childhood, when parents enroll their child in many sections without asking his opinion. Or is it the boss who forcibly sends you to a lecture on turnover. Another type of self-development “out of the blue” is professional development, it is necessary for show, but does not make you feel good. Therefore, then it is difficult for you to remember what the lecturer once said. This development does not bring useful results.

Do the same as everyone

Your friend invites you to attend a psychological seminar and you agree, as she speaks well of him. But you yourself are not particularly interested in psychology, most likely you will not like this pastime. A friend will spend it with benefit and get what she wants, and you will simply waste your time.

A colleague has read an interesting book and recommends it to everyone at work, you should not immediately run and buy it. Maybe you have different tastes with him, and what impressed him you will not like at all. Look for your interests, something that will inspire you and give you a boost of vivacity. We are all different people, so it is normal to have different tastes and points of view on this or that event.

Lack of goals

This is the main reason for your frustration and uncertainty. You seem to be doing something for your own development, but it’s all very messy. Actions do not really bring positive emotions, you do not know what you are striving for, and the current results do not completely suit you.

To achieve high results, not to give up your development halfway, you need to decide on the ultimate goal. For example, you are learning English, is it worth clarifying for yourself why you are doing this? To show off to your friends? For a high-income future job? Or are you planning to travel to an English speaking country? After you decide, it will be easier for you to imagine the algorithm of actions.

Knowledge of theory, lack of practice

Practice is useless without theory, but theory without practice is useless. When you study theory, you need to try it out in practice, otherwise it is a waste of time and energy. What is read is forgotten, the skill is not consolidated. You cannot believe everything that is written in books, you must question everything and test everything in practice. Interns are valued more in the labor market than theorists. After all, anyone can read and learn, but it is not so easy to develop a practical skill.

Looping over failure

If you have failed, then this is not a reason to give up and give up. You have to try and try again and again until you succeed. Children, when they learn to walk, constantly fall, but they do not focus on this. And they try to get up again.

Someone needs more time to learn to walk, someone less. But eventually they all start walking. The same pattern repeats itself when you try to learn to ride a bike, write new songs, or try to play the guitar. Learning is impossible without trial and error.

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Sincerely Media on Unsplash

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